How avoiding pain leads to a lack of joy
I'm sure you are somewhat baffled by the title of this post, but its a topic that is weighing heavily on my heart and one I need to dive deep into with you. I was first exposed to this concept when I pulled out a truth bomb card from Danielle Laporte's deck of truth bombs (I'm pretty sure volume #2, which you can buy here). And I started thinking about all of the times I have avoided the pain, or the embarassing, or the shame, or the fear, instead of taking the leap and putting myself out there. How many of those times when I was avoiding pain, could I have been experiencing true joy and pleasure?
Its stirred up a lot in me, as I begin coaching women on sacred self care and tapping into their femininity because it's where I started about a year ago when I miscarried that tiny human being inside of me. And as much as this experience hurts me, I feel like it was my mind and bodies way of telling me I wasn't ready for the joy, and the experience, until I stepped into and fully expressed my own pain. Before I created the business and life of my dreams. Before I became the self actualized version of myself. Before I stepped into my fear and pain, and said "fuck you".
I've been through the pain and fear now, and I can tell you it's absolutely liberating. It awakens a calling from deep within to step into your true purpose here on earth, and to show up and hold space for the women and men who need to feel their pain. Basically what I have learned is this: the pain and the suffering are the universes little way of showing us just how blissful the joyous moments of our life truly are. We often become so focused on the pain and the suffering, that the rest of our lives (and by this I mean the majority) are truly filled with blissful moments.
We are meant to feel pain and suffering, so that we can truly appreciate the joy of life. We experience pain as a way to learn the lessons we are here on this earth to learn. And in that way, pain is a beautiful thing. Not always necessary - and not always a physical manifestation of pain or struggling, but instead a obstacle or mountain for us to climb. Its beautiful and pivotal in your healing journey, and it really opens your eyes to the miracle that is this life. So what I want you to do when you read this, is grab a journal and a pen and answer these questions:
What pain am I avoiding?
How will conquering it open my life up for joy and pleasure?
What am I afraid of?
What joy can I achieve from this experience?
What is calling me in this moment?
And as a gentle reminder, soften and listen to the voice of your intuition. The voice of divine knowing, and deep love. Know when to experience the pain (or hard thing) and when to let it go, when to open up to the joy.