Self care is a hot topic at the moment. As it should be. However, everyone is telling you to take the time to care for yourself and we automatically go to one of the following:
taking a time out
You know the pretty superficial stuff. But what if we went a little deeper. To a place that filled us up from within without stepping foot into a bath tub or putting on a face mask. What if there were self care practices that were so radically different that they rocked us at our core and made us feel amazing. Well there are. Here are four radically different ways to take care of your whole self and rock your self care routines.
Clean your space. This one may be a no-brainer for some, but for others you are probably thinking “nah I love my mess. I like my clothes all over the place, and the disaster of my room is only organized chaos”. I say this, because well I was that girl. I clearly remember telling my mother that the mess made it easier for me to focus, but I now know that was a load of bullshit.
I now know that this is extremely counterproductive to my wellbeing. So when I get up after my morning in bed rituals, I make my bed (after the hubs to be gets out), put any laundry thats on the floor in the basket, tidy up my desk, water my plant, get the diffuser going with an open window, and get everything sorted. Ah. I now feel ready to face the day.
A clean room is a blank canvas for which to work with. When I get home from a crazy day, I can throw on some music, light some candles, and wind down with ease.
If you have a serious case of disaster area, take some time to go through your stuff and ask yourself this question: does this item bring me joy? If it doesn’t toss it. I also ask is this in good condition (holes, rips, etc), does it fit, is it useful, have I used it in the last three months? And then toss or donate accordingly. A purge every 2-3 months is soooo good. It can also bring up a lot of emotional junk that you can deal with too.
Required reading: The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo
Saying no. This is a novel concept for most of us. But its one I strongly urge you to take on.
Why? Because when you say no you are really opening yourself up for more of the HELL YES. You see saying yes, when you really want to say no to something is absolutely awful for your wellbeing and success. It makes you feel guilty, or adds too much to an already crazy schedule or maybe it makes you feel like you are working for someone else’s agenda. Either way its no good.
Take a couple minutes when someone asks for something of you and ask this question: Is it a HELL YES or a uh sure. If its not a whole body yes, its a no. That simple.
Required reading: Essentialism (trust me - it dives so deep into this concept).
Step out of your comfort zone. Seriously. A couple of months ago I was wandering the bookstore and Mama Gena's book Pussy literally popped off the shelf at me, and I remember looking around the bookstore frantically to see if someone saw me holding it. That book made me uncomfortable. And I knew I had to have it. So I forced myself (in a loving way) to go buy that book. I also bought four others to hide it, but I still bought it. And read it. And it changed my freaking life. It's changed how I want to show up, how I treat myself and how I want to share with all of you. So step out of your comfort zone, here are some ideas:
Buy the book or thing that makes you uncomfortable, because you intuitively know you are meant to have it.
Wear something sexy or out of the norm for yourself. I recently bought myself this gorgeous dress with the softest fabric - but it has a high slit up one of the legs for my upcoming bachelorette weekend and it makes me feel like a goddess.
Take a new class or go to a workshop. Belly dancing. Hip hop. Pottery. Improv. Whatever pushes you and expands your horizons. Try it.
Throw in a pair of headphones and dance in your underwear. I promise, its highly therapeutic.
Cut the toxic people out of your life. This one is hard, and I get that. But TRUST ME, it is so so good for your soul when you cut the nasty or just the people who are no longer serving you out of your life.
Why? Well you are the sum of the five people you spend the most time with. Its true. Take a second and think about your friends or tribe - how many of them make you better, and how many of them encourage your bad habits or start a new one.
Negative people are soul sucking. Honestly. You can feel it. They tend to make you feel negative too. Say bye.
I bet some of these don't even sound like self care practices to you. But that's why they are so radical. If you take the time to try these out, I swear you will understand why I consider them the ultimate self care.